Sounds a lot like ordinary life, doesn't it. I don't know why I imagined that it would simply get better and better every day. And by day 100 I'd ride off into the sunset. Pipe dreams.
Well, perhaps it is in the big picture. My Physical Therapist, Dottie, at Seton Coastside reported that I'm getting stronger and better each time she sees me. Guess I'm just impatient.
Since the last post there have been two milestones: I've taken a trip to Seattle to visit my sister in law, Cheryl and brother Gary and I've returned to my ladies gym, Curves to do my morning workout. I guess this really is progress. What has been happening is that I continue to adjust my view to be a longer one. "Well by Christmas I'll be moving normally." Used to be "in a month" or "two months" . . . the time expectation keeps on expanding. The advice I really need to give myself is "Just take it one day at a time. Do what needs to be done, and be thankful for all that your body is doing to support you day by day. And, Ron, of course, is my constant support.
When I got my hand smashed by an overzealous indoor soccer player last summer, it took three months before I could type regularly again, six months to feel more or less normal, and a year later, I can still feel something just a little "off" when I do push-ups. I had to revise my expectations many times, and as a writer (and tries-to-be-active person in general), it was pretty infuriating. Especially knowing it was all because one knucklehead decided to blow off steam by kicking a ball as hard as he could in close quarters, and of all the directions he could have kicked in, he managed to hit my hand at just the right angle to take it out of commission for months.
ReplyDeleteI tried to appreciate the fact that I had loads of time to watch all the World Cup matches, more time to meditate, to go on a meditation retreat that ended up being really important to me, and to read a lot. (There are so many more good books to read than time to read them.)
And here in Turkey, I've had time and space to do a lot of thinking as well, and I feel like it's been really good for me in intangible but important ways.
Still. I know it's not easy when you want to do what you want to do on a timeline that you choose.
Yep. This universe wasn't designed with our perfect ease in mind. And still we hope and trust and appreciate. Or try to...